Allan Parker

CAMDEN (Oct 2012)


Cathy rang my buzzer

You know my toilet – right?


Well it doesn’t flush properly you have to stick something down the top to make it flush. The thing is what I usually use is a screwdriver and I keep it down the back of my knickers in case you know, I get caughtshort sort of thing, well the other day I was down the Cross and I got searched by the police and when they found the screwdriver they said it was an offensive weapon – so I told them what I just told you – right, about my toilet, but they didn’t believe me and now I got to go to court, so I was wondering – you’ve got a phone haven’t you – if you could ring them and just tell them that I wont be able to make it on time because I’ve got this visit from the benefit woman and I sort of missed out on the last two so I got to be in really…